IV
As a kid, I remember my father teaching me to use chopsticks. As he told me, he learned first in Vietnam, and then he mastered it when he worked in the city after the war. He would go to Chinatown for lunch, and they would provide you with chopsticks to eat your lunch. It was a sink or swim situation (unless you wanted to use your hands).
It didn’t take much time for me to master using chopsticks. I was able to eat my beef with broccoli using them. I was also able to eat my rice with them. As I become more and more adept, I began to pass egg rolls, the soy sauce container, and various other items on the kitchen table using them. I’m very thankful that I learned how to use them at a young age.
At some point in your life, you are going to go to a sushi restaurant, or your job is going to provide sushi at one of its functions. In either scenario, you do not want to be the person who is asking for the fork and knife to eat your food. It’s embarrassing, especially when you consider that by the time you reach adulthood you are almost expected to be able to use chopsticks.
It is one of the many reasons I have been teaching my son to use chopsticks. When he was an infant, I got him his own pair of chopsticks. As it turns out, it is really not necessary to get them because sushi and Chinese restaurants routinely carry chopsticks for children. Still, it is not a bad idea to get your own so your child can learn with their own pair, and you can make sure the chopsticks your child eats with is absolutely clean.
Once my son was able to eat solid foods, we put the chopsticks in his hand when we ate sushi (sweet potato roll for him) just like we put the spoon in his hand when he would eat eggs or sweet potatoes. The idea was to get him accustomed to using them:
As time progressed, he has become more and more adept at using them. Now he is at the point where he is able to feed himself just as well as he can with a knife and a fork if we give him a pair of chopsticks:
Other than the sheer amazement we see from people as a two year old is able to eat his dinner using a pair of chopsticks, and the great picture opportunities, there are a number of reasons why using the chopsticks has been good for own son’s development.
First, it helps your child improve his hand-eye coordination as well as their hand strength. Additionally, at an age where most children struggle to show more two or three fingers at once, the chopsticks help with a child’s finger manipulation. This is a long way of saying the use of chopsticks will help your child’s fine motor skills. Also, keep in mind, that when the time comes, the very same skills that are honed using chopsticks are going to be the very same skills needed when it comes time to learn how to write (which really isn’t that far away).
With my son, we noticed two immediate things when he started to use chopsticks. First, he showed a clear hand dominance. Routinely, he would go to the right hand to use the chopsticks. Second, and most importantly, we began to see him grip and use crayons differently. Instead of grabbing the crayon in a fist, he was able to grip the crayon like you would a pencil. He was able to do it with ease, and when he started drawing, there was more of a purposeful direction in what he was doing (not that the results looked much different). Generally speaking, we his fine motor skills develop at a more rapid pace than they were before he used chopsticks.
Another added benefit is he finds using chopsticks to be fun. With that, he is more eager to sit down and eat at times when we are using chopsticks. As parents know, sometimes getting your child to sit down to eat is a seemingly unnecessary fight. Anything that prevents that fight is a win.
Overall, there are many benefits to your toddler learning to use chopsticks, and on occasion, the use of chopsticks to eat (or play games) should be encouraged.
The year my son was born, the Boston Red Sox won the World Series.
Today, the Chicago Cubs won the World Series.
People waited their whole lifetimes for each of these things to happen, and they never did. He’s three this month, and he’s around for both.
In an odd twist of fate, he has never seen a Yankees World Series.
It was strange typing it. It’s weirder re-reading it.
He was up for the last out, and he went right back to sleep. He has no idea how incredible he got to see something no one on this planet has ever seen.
I just hope he doesn’t have to wait long for a Mets World Series victory.
If you head over to Toys R Us, Target, Walmart, or wherever you went to get your child’s Halloween costume this year, go right back to that place today. Whatever they have in stock is going to be heavily discounted, and you can go get your child’s Halloween costume for next year at a much cheaper price.
Here’s the thing with the costumes: they don’t change from year to year. The superhero costumes you saw on the street yesterday are going to be the same ones you will see next year. It goes the same way with respect to every popular line whether it is Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Thomas and Friends, or Star Wars:
That Yoda costume my son wore last year was sold again this year. Yes, with Episode VII, there were more Star Wars costumes this year, but guess what, those costumes will be available again next year. They will be available with the Yoda and Darth Vader costumes they have everyone year. Finn, Kylo Ren, and Rey are now just part of the group that will always be available. If your kid loves Star Wars get the next costume today.
If you don’t know what your child likes out of the group, or what your child will like next year you have a few options. The first, especially if your child is young enough, is to get a costume for something you have interest (like Star Wars) or that you think is cute like Toy Story.
At this point last year, my wife and I purchased a Woody costume for my son even though he had never seen Toy Story, and we didn’t know if he would like it. Over the past month or so, I would show my son funnier clips from Toy Story (notably the bloopers at the end of Toy Story 2). He thought they were funny, and he began to like Woody, Buzz Lightyear, Rex, and all the characters. He was excited when he got to watch the Halloween special Toy Story of Terror. With the time and effort put in, he actually wanted to be Woody (or Buzz Lightyear) for Halloween. That made our lives much easier:
Now, if you are not sure what your child likes, you could just get multiple costumes. If the costumes are more than 50% off, and they will be in some places, it is still the cheaper route. Once you have an idea of what your child likes either try to return the other one for store credit or just sell it on ebay. You take a hit on the one costume, but you save more money in the long run.
Admittedly, this is not going to work for some older kids. They are going to be more influenced by what their friends like, and they are going to want to go and pick out their costumes. They are also likely going to want to be whatever the new thing is that year (movie, TV show, etc.). If that is the case, you are out of luck. However, if your child is still young enough, you still have a chance to take advantage of an opportunity to save some money.
If that is the case, you should get to the store today and get your child’s Halloween costume for next year.
Everyone knows their own neighborhoods well, and they know the best places to go trick or treating in their own neighborhoods. Some of you even know of places to travel to find the houses that give away the full sized candy bars. Others will try to get to the neighborhoods that leave the bags out with the candy in them so you can fully stock up before moving to another location. Obviously, if you know the best place in your area to go, you should go there.
However, as we saw locally with Hurricane Sandy and Irene, you sometimes need to pivot when it comes to bad weather or when natural disasters cause Halloween to be postponed in your community. You also may want to try something different for a numbers of reasons (traffic in your area, not many houses giving out candy, etc.). With that in mind, here are some alternatives you could try:
Mall
Most malls have trick or treating. There are many benefits to going to your local mall to do the trick or treating. First, you are indoors, so weather is not going to be an issue. With that, your child can fully show off the costume that you purchased or made.
While too much might have been made about it in the past, you know the candy is coming from a business, so there are lesser concerns about someone tampering with the candy.
Another factor is that the mall has a number of benches and seats for you to take a respite. This is not as much of a need now that my son is older, but it was helpful his first Halloween. We needed the rest because we were carrying the candy, the diaper bag, etc. He needed a stop every so often because it’s a lot for a baby to walk around a mall.
Lastly, the mall is well lit with no traffic. Once you are inside, you don’t have to worry about cars coming down the road too quickly or a driver not paying attention. You can also stay indoors trick or treating well after it has gone dark. With this in mind, you could even stop by the mall after your kids are done trick or treating in the neighborhood if they still want to go out and get more candy.
Local Downtown
Most people either live in a town with a nice downtown area, or they live near one. While the downtown doesn’t share all the benefits of the mall, it is still a great place to go trick or treating.
First, local businesses are not going to tamper with the candy they are giving your children. Another benefit is most downtowns do have benches here and there if you need to take a quick stop to sit for five minutes. You also know that even as it gets darker, the sidewalks and streets will be well lit. Additionally, the areas are usually filled with cross walks, stop signs, and police officers (especially on days like Halloween), so you know traffic is going to be less of an issue than it normally is.
There is another benefit to the local downtown. These are primarily comprised on small businesses that want to entice to you to come back to their store. Many of them will hand out not just candy, but coupons to entice you to return to them next year. I know last year we walked home with a free studio session for a pottery studio, a free ice cream cone, 10% off our next pizza order, and a buy one get one offer from the local candy shop. You are not likely to get these at the mall, and you are really unlikely to get them from your neighbors.
Contact Your Local Officials
Many towns try to organize safe or more controlled trick or treating, or in some instances trunk or treating. These events usually take place at a local school parking lot or even at a local park. These are usually organized by the town, school, or sometimes the local police force. These events allow your child to trick or treat in a safer more organized environment. Sometimes, they are accompanied by pumpkin decorating and parades. And like trick or treating in your downtown, many local businesses make an appearance giving away free beverages (juice and hot coffee) and snacks.
Throw a Party
When all else fails, get together with some of your child’s friends’ parents and organize a party. Each parent can bring a goody bag full of candy so no one misses out on getting candy. You can also order pizza and watch scary movies (appropriate age level of course). This allows your child to have fun with their friends, and it allows you to make sure your child is in a safe environment. Note, you can obviously do this in conjunction with any of the above.
I know last year with Halloween being on a Saturday, we did all of the above with our son. We started early at the mall, and then we went to the downtown to grab lunch and trick or treat. We then returned home to just go to a few houses in our neighborhood. Lastly, we sat down and passed out candy while watching the Mets game (that ended scarier than any movie could have). It was fun, and depending on who you are and what you enjoy, I would recommend doing any of the above. The important thing is you are safe and have a good time.
Happy Halloween.
While I had fully intended to create a Thor O’Lantern, it didn’t work out that way.
First and foremost, my son wanted a Thomas pumpkin, and as such, he was going to get one:
Next, I wanted to do a standard pumpkin that he could do himself:
I’m still shocked at two things. First, that a kid’s pumpkin knife so dull it made safety scissors look like a Ginsu knife was actually able to carve the pumpkin. Second, I was really impressed my son was able to follow the lines of the pre-drawn Jack O’Lantern face:
For the last pumpkin, I had wanted to do a Noah Syndergaard one, but the stencil I printed out was too large, and I was too lazy to print out a smaller one. Instead, I decided to go with a Brandon Nimmo:
Ok, so it was Nemo. We all made the joke previously. Accordingly, I’m considering it a Mets themed pumpkin.
Happy Halloween!
For those parents who have not had the time to carve their pumpkins with their children, today is really the last day for you to do so.
One of the great things about having a boy is that they are ready, willing, and eager to get in there and participate in the entire process that is carving the pumpkin. If your son is anything like mine, he wants the knife to do the carving. Naturally, you cannot give a toddler a knife and expect good things to happen. With that said, you are going to have to do some preparation. Last year, I carved the top part out of the pumpkin and then allowed my son outside to help scoop out the seeds and the pulp:
After that, it is time to use some of those really dull pumpkin carving knives so your child can participate. Given a toddler’s dexterity coupled with their hand and arm strength, it is better to go with the traditional triangle eyes and a pretty wide open mouth, if you are going to carve the rest of the pumpkin with them:
For lights, you obviously don’t want your toddler playing with matches or a lighter. That’s just plain dumb. You also don’t want to light something and stick it in the pumpkin. They are going to get curious, and sooner or later, they are going to get burned. Moreover, they are probably going to want to light the pumpkin each and every night because that’s what children do – they want to do the same thing over and over and over and over again. With that in mind, it is probably best for you to get battery operated tea lights. They are everywhere, are reasonably priced, and they can be used over and over again unlike a match. Moreover, you can actually let your child turn the light on and off. As you will notice, the battery operated tea light has the same effect as a regular candle.
For those people who are more adventurous, or have older children, you can attempt to make your own Mets themed pumpkins this year:
Happy #NationalPumpkinDay ?
Download your very own #Mets Pumpkin stencils ➡️ https://t.co/UyAAFjfQOx pic.twitter.com/wOSWnU9x5u
— New York Mets (@Mets) October 26, 2016
For those interested, you can even make your own Noah Syndergaard or Thor O’Lantern.
No matter what path you choose, good luck, and Happy Halloween.
The other day I was in Toys R Us getting a birthday present for one of my son’s friends. On our way to find a toy, we walked through the Halloween aisle.
If you wanted a costume, it was available. Woody and Buzz from Toy Story. All of the Ninja Turtles were available. Star Wars characters old and new:
Then there were the superheroes. All of the Justice League and the Avengers were available. Most notably, there is a Thor costume. No, not the real one:
Dear Empire State Building: Wasn't me (For liability purposes only) pic.twitter.com/OJvxm5s32B
— Noah Syndergaard (@Noahsyndergaard) July 26, 2016
That’s right. No Noah Syndergaard costume. Also, no MLB costumes of any kind whatsoever. This seems like a missed opportunity.
Now, I realize MLB can’t necessarily do player costumes. If this was the 50’s you could, but not in today’s game. With the frequency in which players are traded, you would have to continuously change costumes year to year. At some point, it becomes cost ineffective.
That leaves you with a few options. First is the generic player jersey. Yes, I’m aware there are kid’s uniform sets, but have you seen them?
They’re terrible. They look nothing like the player jerseys. The other issue is they’re hard to find. Another problem is these are only made for five year olds. That eliminates a wide range of children. MLB has to do better than this.
Since MLB can’t do player jerseys and can’t do whatever the above is supposed to be, there are a few options.
The first would be to do an all time player for each franchise. Since these are young kids, you want it to be a player of as recent vintage as possible or a player everyone knows no matter how old they are. Here are some suggestions:
- Mets – Mike Piazza
- Yankees – Babe Ruth or Derek Jeter
- Red Sox – Ted Williams or David Ortiz
- Dodgers – Jackie Robinson
- Mariners – Ken Griffey, Jr.
The benefit of these is you can use them in perpetuity. The downside is these players are more iconic for the parents. That may entice the parent of a toddler to buy it, but an older child has no real attachment to these players. That coupled with the inherent issues with the current players means you need to go with something more basic.
There are two solutions to this, and they both should work well.
The first is to create mascot costumes. If you think about it, the mascot was created to entertain young fans. Generally speaking, it works as kids love team mascots:
There will be many little Mets fans who would love to be Mr. Met for Halloween. Same goes for the other popular mascots across baseball.
For teams without a mascot, baseball could go with standard face like the one on the bobbleheads. In fact, if baseball wanted, they could make them all “Bobblehead Costumes.”
For those that say, they may not sell, give it time. The same exact costume my son wore last year was still for sale a year later. And guess what? It wasn’t the only one.
With that, you help foster a child’s interest in baseball. For the child a little less interested in baseball, perhaps they get more interested due to the Halloween costumes. Kids get interested in things for far less.
Not having MLB Halloween costumes overall seems like a lost opportunity. It doesn’t give the fan a chance to be a player, a mascot, or a bobblehead for Halloween if they so choose. It also allows the kid to move on from baseball a little more after the baseball season is over.
That’s not a good thing. Accordingly, MLB needs to create Halloween costumes.
One of the more difficult things about being a father was missing many of my child’s firsts because I was at work. I missed the first time my son crawled, stood up, walked, and talked. This weekend, I got to experience another one of my child’s firsts, and I could have done without it.
He was stung by a wasp.
When your child is stung by a wasp, especially for the first time, a million thoughts race through your head. My initial reaction was to take the Mets Mike Piazza jersey retirement cap off my head and kill/hit the wasp away. The question then is what do you do next?
The answer to this question is call your pediatrician. Whenever you have a question, call your pediatrician. Go seek medical advice.
Don’t even stop to google it. You’re going to come up with a number of websites with good to really bad advice. You know Web MD is going to say the limb needs to be amputated immediately or worse. You don’t really know how good the other websites are. Some will say it’s not big deal, just rub some dirt on it while others will convince you to immediately call a faith healer because medical science cannot cure your child.
So yes, start with your pediatrician as you always should.
Still reading? Ok. If you want my non-medical doctor advice, keeping in mind you shouldn’t rely on someone else other than a doctor for medical advice, here is how I recommend proceeding. Again, I’m not a medical doctor. I’m just a rationale human being that’s been stung before.
First, get rid of the wasp. It’s going to keep coming back to sting again and again and it might call for backup, so hit it with your hat, a newspaper, etc. Just get rid of it. If there are a number of them around, get out of the area and fast. Don’t risk a second, third, or more stings. If it was a bee, it’s unfortunately going to die now, so pick it up gently (it can’t sting again) and place it in some flowers so it can pass away peacefully.
Second, get the stinger out. Scrape it off with a fingernail, a credit card, etc. Scraping it off is the easiest and probably the best method. Others are using tape to remove the stinger like it’s lint on your business suit or to pinch the skin around it to bring the stinger to the surface and then scrape it away or pluck it out with a tweezer.
Once the stinger is removed, get ice on it as soon as possible. Even if your child isn’t allergic, which thank God, my son isn’t, the area is going to swell and swell quickly. In fact, even with ice the area will still swell. In the case of my son, it went from a wasp sting on the middle finger to him looking like he had an inflated doctor’s glove for a hand. Bee stings aren’t usually this bad though – they might just create a small lump.
The sting should be fine now if your child isn’t allergic. You should only worry if your child breaks out in hives or has trouble breathing. That’s the sign of an allergy. That means you have to get to a hospital immediately for emergency treatment.
Once the situation is handled, get a Band-Aid on it with either some Benadryl cream or a baking soda/water mixture. This will prevent your kid from scratching. Keep in mind, it’s going to itch. If you want to prevent infection, remember to use Polysporin and not Neosporin. Young kids may have an allergy to Neosporin. The worst thing you can do is apply something your child has an allergy to an open wound.
If your child was stung at home, you may have a wasp nest nearby. Check the garden, the eaves and the loft, plus any outbuildings like the shed or garage, to locate the nest. They usually look like a grey mass of paper hanging from the ceiling or attached to a wall, and it’ll be crawling with wasps. Stay well away from it – if they see or smell you they’ll attack you just for being there. Contact a pest control service as soon as possible on a site similar to https://www.pestcontrolexperts.com/local/california/vandenberg-air-force-base/ and leave it to the professionals to destroy. A large wasps nest is full of thousands of wasps which will easily kill you if they sting you enough times.
A bee’s nest, on the other hand, is no risk at all. Bees are friendly and docile unless you physically attack them, so their nest should be left where it is. If it’s in an inconvenient place, get a professional beekeeper to move it for you.
From there, it’s time to go out and get some ice cream and watch the Mets game.
Actually, no, I missed my first game all year even though my son was excited to see Lucas Duda play for the first time in months (I was too). Of course, the Mets game was of secondary concern to my son being alright. And yes, it did help that the Mets won. It always does.
What possesses people of a certain age to wake up and go, “You know what, let’s go to the children’s zoo today!” I would like nothing better than hanging out with a bunch of kids all day. Maybe we can go to Chuck E. Cheese for pizza afterwards!
Technically, yes, you’re permitted to go, and the zoo is happy to take your money.
However, unless you’re Adrian Balboa, why are you there?
Better yet, why do the people who go to the zoo forget it is really intended for kids?
Too frequently, these teenagers, young adults, or just out and out old people have no issue pushing ahead of children to see the penguins, or my favorite reaching past a child to prevent them from feeding the birds.
It’s cute and fun for a toddler to get the bird on a stick. You’re an adult – you need more in your life if you’re either trying to catch the bird a toddler is trying to get, or you’re excited to catch the bird. I mean it’s food on a stick. You’re not exactly baiting and trapping an animal – you know, a real accomplishment.
Also, please explain to me why you feel the need to smoke everywhere. First off, you know it’s not permitted. The laws prevent it. Furthermore, the signs are present telling you you’re not allowed. Simply put, if you’re smoking in a children’s zoo, you’re an awful human being.
Look, I don’t bring my son to nice restaurants like Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse because he doesn’t belong there. As well behaved a child as he is, he’s still a toddler that is prone to acting up, which is similar to how you act looking in the aquarium making Finding Nemo and Finding Dory jokes:
He doesn’t belong there. That’s why I don’t bring him there.
It’s part of the societal contract. I don’t bring my son to adult places where he doesn’t belong. The reciprocation is supposed to be you not being an idiot hanging out at a children’s zoo, forcing your way to the front to see the animals, not paying attention to the kids running around, and even taking a ride on the train.
Overall, there’s just something wrong with you if you’re idea of fun is hanging out in a children’s zoo. Regardless of whether or not you’re on some kind of registry, you know you shouldn’t be hanging out at children’s places. Don’t go to them.
In turn, I will continue to not bring my son to nice restaurants and bars.
Next time you feel the urge to hang out with a bunch of little kids, just go ice skating.
For some reason or other, it appears that most parents decide the time to start having birthday parties for their children with their friends is their third birthday. The parties are a lot of fun because you get to see your son running around and having fun with his friends. However, that does not mean the parties are without their stresses.
The main stress is getting the right present. First and foremost, you want to make sure you get an appropriate gift. You don’t want to show up to a party with a $20 gift when the parents paid $50 or more per child to throw the party. Avoiding this dilemma is quite easy. You can go on the place’s website and find out what they charge for a party, or you can call the place to “schedule your own party” to see what the price is per child. However, this creates another possible problem.
Once you get that first gift, you have effectively set a standard on what you should pay for each and every child’s gifts going forward. Believe it or not, parents talk. Better yet, the parents that talk to one another may not be the ones you expect would be talking with one another. If you got one an action figure and the other a book, sooner or later, they are going to find out about it, and one parent isn’t going to be happy. That could possibly mean that their child does not attend your son’s birthday party when the time comes. Either that, or they will retaliate by giving your son a bad gift. No one wants that.
Speaking of getting what you want, you have to let people know what your child likes. Now, it would be obnoxious to put on the invitation a list of presents your child likes. For some reason that works for Wedding and Baby Showers, but it does not work for birthday parties. However, there is a very subtle way to let everyone know what your child likes:
PUT WHAT YOUR CHILD LOVES ON THE INVITATIONS!
It doesn’t matter if the party is at Chuck E. Cheese, a farm, a zoo, etc. I don’t know what to buy your child if I get a standard Chuck E. Cheese invitation. I’m not going to buy your child a giant mouse just because the party is being hosted there. However, if there is a Mickey Mouse, Thomas the Train, Dora the Explorer, or Mets themed invitation, I know what to buy your child instead of guessing.
One other point. Only put on there what your child really loves. There was one parent who wanted to have a “cute” Peppa Pig Themed Party despite the fact that her daughter really loved Frozen. Apparently, she was able to get reasonably priced Peppa Pig cookie favor and because she was able to get Peppa Pig party favors and decorations reasonably priced. It is certainly understandable why she did it, but she was also appalled at all of the Peppa Pig presents her daughter got.
The simple reason why she got Peppa Pig presents is no one knows anyone else’s child really well – probably not even their best friend. It’s why people bought a ton of Peppa Pig things. They don’t know anything your child likes except what is on the invitation. With that in mind, even if it doesn’t match the theme of the party per se, make sure your invitations match what your child loves. It will ensure your child gets presents that they want, and it will help ensure that your child has a Happy Birthday.
And at the end of the day, that’s all a parent wants for their child.