Cohen: I’ll give you $2.1 billion for the Mets

Fred: 49%

Cohen: It’s only worth $1.5

Fred: Okay 50/50

Cohen: 80% or I walk

Fred: Ok, but I need to stay on

Cohen: Fine

Fred: And Jeff

Cohen: Really?

Fred: He needs a job

Cohen: I might as well. After all, there’s going to be a transition period of a year

Fred: Of 10 years

Cohen: One

Fred: Only if you don’t institute analytics

Cohen: I’m going to use them immediately

Fred: Then I want 20 years of control

Cohen: Control of what?

Fred: The Mets

Cohen: You get this offseason with five years of mostly ceremonial titles

Fred: Deal

Cohen: Great. I’ll have my lawyers draft the paperwork, and you notify the league office.

Fred: And I’ll notify payroll payroll Jeff’s salary is doubled.

Cohen: That’s it. I’m done.

Fred: Okay, only doubled in year five, but he has control until then.

Cohen: Go find another sucker. I’m not buying the team.

Fred: We don’t need you. We’ll just have Allen & Company sell the team.

Cohen: You’re going to have your grandson sell the team?

Fred: Absolutely

Cohen: I don’t think it’s shock to anyone anymore you got caught up in multiple Ponzi schemes.

Fred: Wait, you have another investment opportunity?

Cohen: Bye Fred.